Look, I try really hard to be positive on this blog. I try to tell you all the stuff I am up to, and share inspiring things I find. 98% of the time, that really is authentically me. I am so blessed. I'm doing what I love, supported by a great family, and surrounded by truly remarkable friends.
But, honestly, that is not me today.
Do you ever have days when you are just done? I am today.
I am tired.
I'm tired of being judged.
I'm tired of having to be constantly on my guard because some of my most deeply held beliefs are offensive to some of the people closest to me.
I'm tired of watching others denigrate and dismiss my sincere questions and concerns.
I'm frustrated that people are so judgmental and unwilling to put themselves in someone else's shoes.
And I'm tired of feeling frustrated.
I'm tired of trying so hard to be thoughtful and conscientious in my opinions and beliefs, when so many others just shoot from the hip and don't care think before they speak. Especially when there is no right or wrong answer.
I'm tired of people assuming that because I am 'nice,' I am weak.
I'm tired of people acting like they know stuff when really they have no freaking idea what they are talking about...pride, man, it's the worst.
I'm sick and tired of other people telling me how I should feel and think.
It bums me out that I feel guilty about letting people know how I feel, and I almost didn't post this.
I know that tomorrow or next week things will not seem so bleak and I will have some of my strength back, but for now I'm just going to let myself be tired. Time to curl up with some hot chocolate!
2 comments:
Amen. I've felt so emotionally exhausted lately and very misunderstood. Even though it's not a pleasant feeling, it's nice to know someone else feels the same way.
I cannot begin to tell you how frustrated I become when people mistake kindness for weakness... Why do people assume a kind heart is a weak heart? So frustrating. Hang in there Jess, you're a strong lady!!
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