It has been almost a year since I moved to Rochester and started graduate school. Time has flown by! A couple of people have asked me recently what the biggest difference has been between college and graduate school, or what the biggest adjustment has been. There have been a lot of things, but two major ones stick out in my head.
First, I am expected to have an opinion and be vocal about it. I'm supposed to speak up. I went to a big high school and a big university where I could get by under the radar if I wanted to (which, let's be honest, that's exactly what I wanted most of the time...I get horrible social anxiety when I have to speak up). It's been really good to learn about my own head and how it works, and to really have to know what I think about things rather than just going along with everyone else.
The other things is that I have to do things before I master them. Let me see if I can explain what I mean. In college and high school, you take a class, learn the material, then demonstrate that you know it through a test or project or something. Now it's different; research is something that you have to learn by doing. Grad school is kind of like an apprenticeship in that you work under the supervision of an advisor. They are there to give you guidance and make sure you aren't doing shoddy work. It's a totally different paradigm than what I'm used to and it makes me feel really insecure sometimes. Anyone who knows me well knows I'm a perfectionist and I hate making mistakes. I have to keep reminding myself that it's ok if I don't know everything or do everything right the first time. I'm still learning how to do this academia thing, and there is a framework in place to support that.
It's been an adjustment, definitely, and I'm still not 100% sure that I know what I'm doing a lot of the time. But it is becoming more comfortable. I enjoy it a lot, and am happy with the work I am doing. Here's to learning new things!
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